It struck me, as I sit awake at near 1am on a Thursday/Friday how much my life
has changed. We all change. We make mistakes, we think we know
everything, we grow (hopefully). It struck me in just a moment of how many years ago at 1am on a Thursday I'd be in a bar, unsure where I
was, and trying to escape the feelings I now am begging Him to help me
deal with. Not drink away and suppressing, really dealing with. To heal with the amazing love only He provides. Lately, I've been working on softening my heart. I am so Irish, through and through, I need His love to help me to be slow to anger, quick to listen and forgive. It often feels like running an uphill battle on St. Patrick's day, but I am committed. I have felt my heart "hardening" emotionally the last few days again and I have been so blessed by the "small, yet subtle" reminders He has placed in front of me.
Maybe it's a small and silly thing to think about, but
it struck me in such a way. Like if Back to the Future me showed up
right now she'd hopefully feel peace that life won't always be so
chaotic and lost as it was in my early twenties?
St. Louis is
under a heat wave and this Mama is none too pleased. Lord love the
roofers who have been working in this heat. Kiddo and I have mostly been
enjoying INDOOR activities. I finally got him enrolled in school and
managed not to cry...yet. Who knew 5 would come so fast. It's so amazing
to watch him grow into his own personality and strong young man, but
it's also hard to watch my baby go and make his own choices.
Movie cuddles cus mama wasn't feeling good
My
body doesn't react well to any heat above 80 degrees (I know, I know, why am I
living in the Midwest). So, I've been in and out of the
Doctors/hospitals. The Xray girls couldn't read my Dr.'s orders and I
ended up with a full body xray instead of just a lower. Turns out I have
some bone deterioration at 24 years old, which certainly isn't normal. So, this
is a new challenge to face. They aren't really sure why or what it means
yet, but I'm thankful to be starting physical therapy Sept 1. I am thankful for my loving partner being forever calm in scary situations where I over react, I am thankful to know that even if it turns out to be nothing or the worst case scenario, he is by my side. That is true love.
I stole a peek of my neck-rays, is that illegal?
I stole a peek of my neck-rays, is that illegal?
